There’s a terrifying moment that comes after you hit publish, or send, or pick up the mic. A split second of realization; that you are out there. You’ve volunteered yourself upon the world. You’ve poured your heart and soul into the work that will now be revealed. There’s no going back. Everything has led up to this point.
Living completely within your comfort zone means passing up on these moments. If you never finish a book, you need never receive a review. If you never take centre stage, you can skip hair and makeup. If you never enter the race, you’ll never know if you could have won.
Shying away from limelight because of what people might think or say is a tragic excuse for inaction. Here’s how to master the art of putting yourself out there.
How to master the art of putting yourself out there
Unsplash – Product School
Increase your attention to detail
Every flawless TED talks took hours of planning, editing and practising; perhaps one hundred times the fifteen-minute talk length. The impressive prototype took undivided attention and improvements to be stage-ready. The more effortless something looks, the more effort actually took place.
The worry you have about exhibiting your work is inversely proportionate to how incredible you genuinely feel it is. All you can give is everything you’ve got. If your all has been given, the fear will be replaced by an excitement to present.
The happiness that comes with excellence is a unique feeling. In this moment, you’re bulletproof. You can withstand any remarks because you couldn’t have given more. Attention to detail is the difference between average and stunning. Between amusing and hilarious. Between mildly interesting and captivating. Don’t miss a beat and you’ll delight in the opportunity to be seen.
Create an alter-ego
You can be yourself or you can create an alter-ego. A character. It represents the version of you that has everything this performance needs. It’s the writer with a pen name or the singer with an alias.
They may only be subtly different to the person you really are, but they have some traits that make them happier in the limelight. The presence of a character lets you outsource any stage fright and focus on your craft.
Describe your character in detail so you can easily step into their shoes. What do they look, and sound like? What vibes do they radiate? How do they walk, talk and carry themselves? Give them a brand and match it to every action they take. Call on them during a key phone call, a big decision, a podcast interview or a media appearance.
Incorporate elements of your heroes within this character. Do they strut like a catwalk model or do they communicate as clearly as the speaker of the house? Perhaps they exude confidence like a television presenter or are as humble as your favourite writer. Create the trigger for the character taking over and deploy whenever necessary.
How to master the art of putting yourself out there
Unsplash – Siora Photography
What’s the worst that could happen?
In my first year of high school I ran the hurdles race on sports day. I fell comically over a hurdle in front of the whole school and came in last place. I was teased for a while after, but I didn’t care. Although it wasn’t a conscious choice, I decided that I wasn’t going to let that moment define me. It was a one-off slip, literally, and I refused to associate with that version of myself.
Plenty of Oscar-winning actresses have tripped collecting their awards. Plenty of performers have hit technical difficulties, fluffed their lines or missed their cue. One-off mistakes and accidents aren’t ever the end of the world. How you respond to them is what will be remembered.
The worst that could happen, if you don’t put yourself out there, is that someone else will. One day you’ll be minding your own business, convincing yourself you made the right choice, when you’ll see someone living the life you were too scared to go out there and live. There are plenty of healthy-living chefs, but Joe Wickes put himself out there. There are plenty of people cleaning their own house, but Mrs Hinch dared to dream. For every bestselling book there are thousands that sit as unpublished manuscripts on someone’s dusty hard drive.
Don’t take it personally
You are not your internet persona and you are not your Instagram feed. Your headshot or avatar is the public-facing element of your work but it’s not the whole story. Truly happy people do not bring others down. Stop caring about what other people think. So what if someone doesn’t like your hair or your outfit? So what if you are judged based on what you just said? “According to Gayle King, “When people don’t want the best for you, they are not the best for you.”
Distance yourself from compliments and criticism by cultivating indifference to both. Critics are not your concern. Compliments won’t make you. Become so sure of your path that you could hear any feedback and not lose any sleep. Stay grounded no matter the highs or lows. Keep making good art and focus on the labour, not the fruits. The inputs, not the response.
Ten years from now, you’ll look back over the decade and wish you’d had the confidence to go for it. Twenty years from now you’ll feel silly for taking yourself so seriously. Thirty years from now you’ll think you’ve missed your chance. Make good art and put it out there.
LONDON (AP) — With a few daubs of a paintbrush, the Brontë sisters have got their dots back.
More than eight decades after it was installed, a memorial to the three 19th-century sibling novelists in London’s Westminster Abbey was amended Thursday to restore the diaereses – the two dots over the e in their surname.
The dots — which indicate that the name is pronounced “brontay” rather than “bront” — were omitted when the stone tablet commemorating Charlotte, Emily and Anne was erected in the abbey’s Poets’ Corner in October 1939, just after the outbreak of World War II.
They were restored after Brontë historian Sharon Wright, editor of the Brontë Society Gazette, raised the issue with Dean of Westminster David Hoyle. The abbey asked its stonemason to tap in the dots and its conservator to paint them.
“There’s no paper record for anyone complaining about this or mentioning this, so I just wanted to put it right, really,” Wright said. “These three Yorkshire women deserve their place here, but they also deserve to have their name spelled correctly.”
It’s believed the writers’ Irish father Patrick changed the spelling of his surname from Brunty or Prunty when he went to university in England.
Raised on the wild Yorkshire moors, all three sisters died before they were 40, leaving enduring novels including Charlotte’s “Jane Eyre,” Emily’s “Wuthering Heights” and Anne’s “The Tenant of Wildfell Hall.”
Rebecca Yorke, director of the Brontë Society, welcomed the restoration.
“As the Brontës and their work are loved and respected all over the world, it’s entirely appropriate that their name is spelled correctly on their memorial,” she said.
