If you brought up the topic of courtesy many of us would say what the hell is that? Many would say that because they do not see much of the art of courtesy these days, or they would not recognize it when it happens. Others may simply not know what courtesy is if they even see it shown.
Courtesy is the showing of politeness in one’s attitude, actions and behaviour towards others. Seen this in your daily experiences on the road, at work, in the grocery store or in its parking lot? Have people around you waited until you stop talking before giving their 2%? Have you or someone else opened a door for another? Was it expected or did it surprise you at all?
In the past, what many call the good old days, things like courtly love and courtship exemplified social courtesy. The honour of a knightly-minded person was graceful yet protective of the innocent and ladies about them. There were rules to stand by at that time, where society and religion placed notable social regulations upon men and women alike. In China, many people have three names, the family name, the given name and the courtesy name. The courtesy name shines forth that person’s virtues.
Courtesy is truly difficult to recognize these days as we struggle to work to earn our daily bread and go to the market, and retail environments all with a mass of people challenging our patience, charity and respect for others. The roadway is often a mental health torture chamber, and shopping can be awkward, troublesome tiring, and perhaps torturous as well. Being a nice person is totally difficult when those around you don’t have the ability to see how they may be acting, perhaps saying things that are hurtful and unkind. You may sit in your seat and feel your temperature rising as your anger prepares to get the better of you.
In the past courtesy was shown personally and even nationally. There is a human element within the actions of a courteous person that attracts a positive reaction from another. You let someone drive ahead of you or hold the door for them, perhaps engage them in conversation as well. A Smile Goes a Long Way. It is as contagious as acts of courtesy are.
In Rome, a total stranger helped me when I lost my wallet. I found myself helping others in return, but also it felt good to do so. Being Kind, Respectful and Courteous is Contagiously Addictive. A Good Addiction.
Hazrat Ali ibn Abu Talib is said to have said “Courtesy costs nothing but buys everything”. He was the cousin and son-in-law of the Prophet Muhammed and a wise fellow. Of all our actions, thoughts and aspirations, to be truly courteous is a grand affair and aspiration, that can lead to another great emotional experience, that of love. Ask yourself why you are or wish to be courteous. Being a good person is simply the best type of person you can aspire to folks.
Thomas Fuller said “All doors open to courtesy”. Perhaps we all need to think, act and revere the very thought of courtesy within our lives. Cheers.
Steven Kaszab
Bradford, Ontario
[email protected]
